I’m so relieved, proud, and just plain happy to have an essay up at The Millions. I worked on this piece for a long time–and ultimately cut out about 2000 words before it was publication-ready.
I drafted it long before I was even pregnant with Simon, and I’m struck by the way in which life feels like it’s provided another paragraph (or section?) to the essay. In the weeks after we brought Simon home, women (except for my dad, they were all women) brought dinners, offers of help with either or both children, and the kind of conversation caring enough to allow honest discussion.
For me, friendship as a mom really is different. The intensity of love I have for my children makes it harder (both practically and emotionally) to attach to friends in the way I once thought of as the definition of friendship. But, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how there’s an intensity in asking to hear a birth story or dropping off a casserole or reassuring an exhausted mother that I might not have recognized before. (That’s a thought for another essay.)